You and a pretty redhead are tucked away in a corner table at that impossible-to-get-into new French bistro. And lo and behold, you notice she’s laughing at your jokes, twirling her hair, and giving other crystal-clear signs she’s into you.
Or is she?
Problem is, it can be hard to tell sometimes whether a woman is truly interested or just going through the motions. But luckily, there are plenty of ways to tell the difference. The signs below are the real deal.
1. She touches herself up
If she’s excusing herself to the restroom between courses, it’s doubtful she has a weak bladder. Nope, more likely she’s in there freshening up her makeup or making sure her hair is in place... all for you.
“If she’s into you, she’ll be concerned with how she looks,” says Alison James, author of the forthcoming Better Off Wed? “Or, if she’s at the table, she’ll be fixing her shirt or brushing her hair back, maybe checking that her bra strap isn’t showing or adjusting her necklace — the kind of stuff you do when you’re worried about your appearance.”
2. She asks about your family
“When a woman likes a guy, she doesn’t want to get to know just him,” says Jillian Straus, author of Unhooked Generation: The Truth About Why We’re Still Single. “She wants to know about his family and friends — she’s looking for clues about what life with him would be like.”
Indeed, especially if you’ve been set up or are on a blind date and know very little about each other, your relationship with your family says a lot about you — and a woman interested in you won’t hesitate to probe.
“I think family is very revealing about a person’s personality,” says Tina Andreadis, 35, of New York City. “If he’s close with his family, it shows that he’s probably a warm person who values relationships and who would want a family of his own. If I am not interested in him, I won’t even ask because I just don’t care.”
3. She’s attentive
Let’s put it this way: no matter how busy she is, she’s not whipping out her BlackBerry if she’s interested in what you have to say.
“If she’s not checking her watch, email or cell phone, it’s just one more sign that she’s paying attention to you,” says James. “When you like a guy, you’re hanging on his every word. When you don’t, you’re distracted easily.”
Same goes for any preoccupations she has with the immediate environment, whether she’s people-watching or admiring the restaurant décor or even the food.
If she’s saying things like, “This restaurant is beautiful. Hey, doesn’t that girl over there look like Marisa Tomei?” she may be enjoying herself, but not necessarily because you’re there.
4. She’s touchy-feely
If you find your date engaging in a little physical contact along with witty banter, chances are you’ve made a very good impression. From tapping your knee to emphasize a point or touching your forearm to get your attention, if a woman’s attracted to you, she won’t hesitate to reach out and let you know.
Megan, 35, from New York City, employs this trick with guys she finds attractive.
“I pretend to steady myself when I don’t need to be steadied,” she says. “When I’m climbing onto a stool, I’ll grab onto his shoulder or leg when I clearly don’t need to,” she laughs.
5. The date lasts longer than you expected
Ask any woman desperate to wind down a date, and she’ll tell you she skips dessert or declines an after-dinner stroll.
Naturally, then, if she’s having a great time and doesn’t want to see you go, she’ll gladly take the waiter’s suggestion and try the chocolate cake, or join you in the cab ride home. And if you’ve agreed to meet for coffee and after a few sips she takes you up on your offer of dinner? That’s a bright green light, my friend.
“Only if I’m into the guy will I agree to go to dinner if he suggests it on a ‘meet for coffee’ date,” says Diana, a 38-year-old from Boston. “If I’m meeting a guy and I’m not into him, I’m definitely not going to agree to get food after.”
So now that you know the signs that she’s really enjoying your time together, use them! Ask her for another date, have a goodnight hug or smooch... and things should move in a most positive direction.
Cate Mitchell is a freelance writer in New York City.
Article courtesy of Happen magazine, www.happenmag.com.
Friday, February 25, 2011
Thursday, February 17, 2011
Bidding by game word rate?
Answer to a LinkedIn independent writer's question.
--------------------------------------------------------
Because like you said, in game narratives, you spend a great deal of time, brain, and emotional energy choosing the right single word or trimming phrases to keep the word count down; but still retain a coherent story with emotional and psychological depth, for more than one layer of comprehension for your readers.
You are charging for that, as well, your expertise in storywriting, not just word count.
I stress this in my bids and proposals, and sometimes I win and sometimes I lose, just like with any bidding process.
But I've also been given praise for improving a game script by changing only a few words.
And there are too many stories of all kinds I've read with glaring holes and gaffs because materials aren't edited in NYC or anywhere else like they used to be "in the good ole days."
Your expertise includes not just twenty words here and forty there but intelligence and polish that will close those holes and eliminate gaffs like a baby's eyes and hair changing color or an adult heroine's height changing within about five pages. [Yes, these are real published, glaring mistakes editors and publishers have published.]
As a professional storywriter, you're holding continuity in your brain and making certain it's on the page. I can't tell you how many times I've check a thing in a story here or there, to be certain logic, continuity, reason, and emotion, and just common sense are lined up properly.
Check at Guru.com and Elance.com through past bids of the type you're doing, see who won and do the math, to see if you're in the ball park. Don't underbid unless you have to; an unhappy writer, who's doing a lot a work for a little pay, makes unhappy copy; and no repeat client.
Oh, and if you feel you're charging a little higher, say so and say what they get for that: expertise, continuity, and x amount of rewrites or tweaks. I usually keep the rewrites within the job but say I'll do a tweak, after completion, if needed. Since, those stray words and misspellings do trip us up.
This is just great customer service without getting into the groveling, I'll do anything for cheap cents. Because, if they're that cheap or poor, the client should write it themselves, that's how I learned to write, or hire their kid or their kid's friends.
Helpful?
--------------------------------------------------------
Because like you said, in game narratives, you spend a great deal of time, brain, and emotional energy choosing the right single word or trimming phrases to keep the word count down; but still retain a coherent story with emotional and psychological depth, for more than one layer of comprehension for your readers.
You are charging for that, as well, your expertise in storywriting, not just word count.
I stress this in my bids and proposals, and sometimes I win and sometimes I lose, just like with any bidding process.
But I've also been given praise for improving a game script by changing only a few words.
And there are too many stories of all kinds I've read with glaring holes and gaffs because materials aren't edited in NYC or anywhere else like they used to be "in the good ole days."
Your expertise includes not just twenty words here and forty there but intelligence and polish that will close those holes and eliminate gaffs like a baby's eyes and hair changing color or an adult heroine's height changing within about five pages. [Yes, these are real published, glaring mistakes editors and publishers have published.]
As a professional storywriter, you're holding continuity in your brain and making certain it's on the page. I can't tell you how many times I've check a thing in a story here or there, to be certain logic, continuity, reason, and emotion, and just common sense are lined up properly.
Check at Guru.com and Elance.com through past bids of the type you're doing, see who won and do the math, to see if you're in the ball park. Don't underbid unless you have to; an unhappy writer, who's doing a lot a work for a little pay, makes unhappy copy; and no repeat client.
Oh, and if you feel you're charging a little higher, say so and say what they get for that: expertise, continuity, and x amount of rewrites or tweaks. I usually keep the rewrites within the job but say I'll do a tweak, after completion, if needed. Since, those stray words and misspellings do trip us up.
This is just great customer service without getting into the groveling, I'll do anything for cheap cents. Because, if they're that cheap or poor, the client should write it themselves, that's how I learned to write, or hire their kid or their kid's friends.
Helpful?
Saturday, February 05, 2011
"Inappropriateness," Amazon Kindle, www.Elance.com and (Multiracial, Gay) Sex
Someone said at my facebook members only site that they "didn't have a problem with it but" thought it was somewhat "inappropriate."
-----
My statement:
Odd that Kindle has rejected a cover and book content of my new novella. they imply that it is inappropriate and maybe unredeeming hardcore porn.
It's redeemable and highly great hardcore porn/romantic erotica.
And the cover is almost EXACTLY the same_with less nudity and a condom_of the previous title in the series.
Do ...you think it's because this one's not about heterosexual incest but is about a gay threeway?
-----
My facebook group answer:
No problem. If anyone has, had a problem with my post above_just think of it as equal time for all the snapshots and "inappropriately" tagged that get posted and don't really connect with us either.
But it does reflect about the strange oddities and vagaries of "inappropriateness" of creation, whether digital art, film or publishing, that we'll be sometimes ignored, sometimes "c" blocked, sometimes censured, and sometimes greatly loved.
And there really isn't any specific logic given nor explanation, only that it is "too different," "makes us squirm," or "seems" rather inappropriate, to them, at present,etc.
=====
It seems silly since you can go to Amazon and Kindle and get hardcore porn from Adam and Eve, Playboy, etcetera. Plus they publish my stuff there and at Borders, etc through my partnership with Ingram/Lightning Source.
But, really this cover and the previous one are nearly identical. This one is "cleaner" I go rid of the lace panties girl with the condom in her hand. http://north.neale-sourna.com/
And that previous title cover is a compilation of a teen seducing her dad and learning all about sex and her horny friends seducing their friends MILF moms etc; but, have a 2 teens of age with a teach/prof, all willing go gay threeway...?
They've usually sell the titles and just block the covers of school-relatedness. And I don't really care. I just find it interesting. You just never know who at their site will glance at your stuff and go gaga.
We erotic freelancers at www.Elance.com have the same problem with them. Someone posts anything that mentions sex, erotic, etc. and it gets blocked with a vengeance. But, post a job requesting writing bids about a serial killer and how to murder or rape people violently and they never block that.
-----
My statement:
Odd that Kindle has rejected a cover and book content of my new novella. they imply that it is inappropriate and maybe unredeeming hardcore porn.
It's redeemable and highly great hardcore porn/romantic erotica.
And the cover is almost EXACTLY the same_with less nudity and a condom_of the previous title in the series.
Do ...you think it's because this one's not about heterosexual incest but is about a gay threeway?
-----
My facebook group answer:
No problem. If anyone has, had a problem with my post above_just think of it as equal time for all the snapshots and "inappropriately" tagged that get posted and don't really connect with us either.
But it does reflect about the strange oddities and vagaries of "inappropriateness" of creation, whether digital art, film or publishing, that we'll be sometimes ignored, sometimes "c" blocked, sometimes censured, and sometimes greatly loved.
And there really isn't any specific logic given nor explanation, only that it is "too different," "makes us squirm," or "seems" rather inappropriate, to them, at present,etc.
=====
It seems silly since you can go to Amazon and Kindle and get hardcore porn from Adam and Eve, Playboy, etcetera. Plus they publish my stuff there and at Borders, etc through my partnership with Ingram/Lightning Source.
But, really this cover and the previous one are nearly identical. This one is "cleaner" I go rid of the lace panties girl with the condom in her hand. http://north.neale-sourna.com/
And that previous title cover is a compilation of a teen seducing her dad and learning all about sex and her horny friends seducing their friends MILF moms etc; but, have a 2 teens of age with a teach/prof, all willing go gay threeway...?
They've usually sell the titles and just block the covers of school-relatedness. And I don't really care. I just find it interesting. You just never know who at their site will glance at your stuff and go gaga.
We erotic freelancers at www.Elance.com have the same problem with them. Someone posts anything that mentions sex, erotic, etc. and it gets blocked with a vengeance. But, post a job requesting writing bids about a serial killer and how to murder or rape people violently and they never block that.
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